Unemployment

As I reflect on the last year as an employee of Ewha American Language School, I am affronted by a barrage of emotions, memories, and conclusions on my experience. When digesting my time at the academy some words that come to mind include: growth, adaptation, humility, unique, impactful, patience, and enduring. I still can’t believe that my year contract has come to an end and in just a few weeks, my time in Korea will conclude. Like most things, it’s flown by. I suppose looking back I naturally chunk everything into seasons. So, in an effort of self-reflection, let’s regress to fall of 2010.

Fall.
My first few months in Korea were undeniably the hardest. Like many of us who live abroad for large spans of time, the beginning is the challenge. If you can make it past the beginning unscathed, then you can survive for months, years…My biggest challenge was twofold. The first was learning to live alone. I spent many nights in the first couple months feeling very lonely and removed. I missed my friends, family, and what was comfortable. God really blessed me with not only a great social circle in the months to come but also peace in my solitude. The second challenge was at work. I had to adapt fairly quickly to a system of teaching very unlike what I had experienced throughout my time in college. Also, getting along with my boss became a thing of its own and I was forced to deal with someone who didn’t openly show their appreciation for my hard-work. The first few months were tough but I knew there was light on the horizon.

Winter.
Winter brought about a change in the atmosphere in the work place. In some ways, the day-to-day seemed to be getting more relaxed. Of course, any time I felt as if I could push my limits a bit, it was shoved not so delicately back in my face. Through this time I grew less frustrated and bitterer with my circumstances. I was quick to compare my situation with my friends’ schools that seemed to be leagues better. And they probably were, but that’s not the point here is it. I needed to be reminded over and over that God put me in this place, this school for a reason. Maybe I didn’t realize it at the time but I was being sharpened. As the months grew colder I learned some important lessons in biting one’s tongue, keeping your head down and letting the little things roll off your back.

Spring.
Maybe it was the onslaught of visitors I had; perhaps it was the taste of summer in the air, either way spring practically flew by. Things finally seemed to be leveling out at the school and I certainly had found my groove so to speak. I remember going to work on Friday asking myself where the work week had gone. I feel I should give myself a bit of credit for figuring out “the system” at work. The system included agreeing to everything my boss told me, appeasing my students with a delicate balance of book work and English appropriate games, and finishing everything way ahead of schedule. In fact, I feel as if I spent less time trying to get away with playing games with the kids and more time just talking with them openly about their lives. I especially enjoyed this liberty in my older more advance classes. In many ways I felt as if I had a responsibility to talk to these students about issues that their parents weren’t discussing with them. Spring felt more rewarding than months prior and furthermore I was actually starting to really enjoy my life teaching overseas.

Summer.
I feel as if I had been unconsciously counting down the days ‘til I finished from the first day I rode my scooter without a jacket. I knew the end was near and so did my boss. In some ways this was a good, in some ways this wasn’t so good. For instance, it was great because I could count the number of times I’d have to make tests and evaluations on one hand which would give me a feeling of finality. Then again, my boss did everything she could to eke out of me whatever she could before I was gone. “Can you make these extra tests? Can you teach this extra class? Could you leave school later than the other teachers to accommodate some students?” But you know what, I agreed to everything with a smile because I knew deep down that it wasn’t going to last forever. I went to work, worked, and came home.

Now that it’s all said and done I can honestly say that I would have done it again. The goods, the bads, every bit of it. I was impacted deeply in my time with the students, coworkers, and even my bosses. It was a time that won’t be replicated in my life again and I’m thankful to God that he brought me not only to Korea to teach but specifically to my school, my apartment, and my neighborhood. He knew exactly what he was doing and I can’t help but think that my future rests comfortably in His hands. While I feel every bit satisfied with my teaching experience in Korea I know that I wasn’t perfect. But you live and learn and that’s what I’ll do with these reflections.

IN OTHER NEWS!
I’m currently living with my friends Jacob and Candace in their apartment which has been great. Now that I’m only working at my kindergarten in the morning I’ve had a lot more time to read, run, and do other relaxing activities. I’ve also been busy preparing for my trip through Thailand and Cambodia which I’ll be sure to write more about as it approaches. In my last few weekends here in Korea I’ll be trying to spend as much time with friends as possible and taking advantage of all the final opportunities to experience Korea. My prayer is that these last 3 weeks would be fulfilling, relaxing, spiritually challenging, and a time of transition.

Please continue to pray in these ways:
~Travel to Thailand and The Philippines. Pray for God’s will in the planning.
~I’ll be seeking employment in the States upon my return. Pray that the Lord would provide a job if it’s his leading.
~Many Korean people have no idea who God is. Pray for those I come into contact with to thirst for real truth
~That the Word would continue to be spread in the hard to reach places and where Christians are not free to worship
~Discernment, wisdom, and patience for God’s will
~Finding ways I can be Jesus to my friends, students, co-workers, and perfect strangers

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My Last Day!!! (Video Update!)

404 days later, today is my last day of employment at Ewha American Language School. While I’d like to say that I’m sad to be done here, I can’t help but admit that I am relieved. I feel like I’ve learned a lot in the last 13 months from working at this academy and I’m sure I will use what I’ve experienced to make me a better teacher in the future. The change in pace I’m sure will take a little getting used to but I’m excited to have a bit of rest before I travel through Thailand, Cambodia, and Laos this October. Thank you everyone for their prayers over the last year, I know they helped! I’m busy as ever right now moving out of my apartment and into my friends Jacob and Candace’s apartment. Also, I’m leaving for an extended holiday weekend to Jeju Island tomorrow morning! I’m sure I will write more about my last year in Jinhae once I have more time to sit down and digest it all, but right now it’s all still a whirlwind of change. In the mean time, please enjoy my most recent video update of my Korean Summer ::Part II::!

Korean Summer ::Part II:: from Caleb Hatfield on Vimeo.

The second installment of my Korean Summer. Lots of travelling, some goodbyes, and even a little water. Places include Jinhae, Changwon, Seoul, Sokcho, Saraksan, Namhae, and Busan. Enjoy!

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Video! driving through Jinhae

I already put this up on Facebook a few days back but here it is on my blog just in case you missed it!

a drive through Jinhae from Caleb Hatfield on Vimeo.

A quick and short video of driving along the coast of Jinhae, South Korea. Props to Jessi for her videographer skills.

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Video Update! Korean Summer Part 1

Korean Summer ::Part 1:: from Caleb Hatfield on Vimeo.

My Korean summer has been filled with everything from days at the beach to waterfalls to DJ festivals to theme parks. It seems like there’s always something going on! Enjoy this first part to my Korean Summer and be sure to check out Part 2 coming soon!

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Korean Dental Care

So, it’s been awhile. And instead of going on about how busy I’ve been and where I’ve been traveling, I’d instead like to tell you a little story…

This morning I had a dental appointment. But this trip to the dentist was certainly a unique one. Afterall, I am in Korea so what do you expect, right? They called my name “Caleb James” and I headed to the chair, laid back, and was met with a barrage of Korean asking if I knew how to speak Korean. I of course replied, “Jokim”, or “a little”. My hygienist proceeded with the check up and then asked if I wanted “scaling”, or what we might refer to as “a cleaning”. “Nay”, I replied and we were on our way. I was expecting what I would expect in America for whatever reason so when they put the cloth face mask over me, I was a little taken back. I’ve never had the notion that I was being led to the executioner while getting my teeth cleaned, but now we can check that off my bucket list. So, laying back, blind to the world around me, the scaling began. I figured it would start with a metal pick or some floss but I was proven wrong on both accounts. Before I had time to react, a drill of some sort with a suction device started going to town on the nooks between each of my teeth. Let’s back up for a second because I need to preface something about my gum line. It’s delicate and you might even go as far to say pure. Why? Because I rarely put a piece of floss to it. Yes, yes I know I should BUT because of that, they are not by any means resilient. Even in the states when I get my teeth cleaned and they began the flossing, pools of blood develop just behind my lower lip. Well, those pools were no comparison to the waterfalls that must have been gushing from my gums this morning. It almost felt as if the tool she was using was actually trying to carve out my teeth from my gums and lower my line as a whole! The best part was that I was laying on my back with hardly anything to catch my mouthful of blood. I did the only thing I could do and that was to try and gag down gulps of my own self-produced ruby-red. It was miserable. And every time my mask was lifted so I could spit into the small trough, I felt as if I was being granted a 15 second recess from a temporary hell. What I saw come out of my mouth was far from pretty. The good news: my teeth are cleaned, it took less than 30 minutes, and this stomach full of whatever I have should tie me over for the afternoon. Something unsettling tells me this won’t be the last time I have an overseas dental experience.

Aside from having my gums beat to little more than a bloody pulp, life has been fairly normal. I’ve been working an adjusted summer schedule the last 3 weeks, so my hours have been more daytime. During the evenings I’ve been reading a lot more and spending more time alone. Living by myself, you would assume I have a lot of this solidarity but that would be an ill-made assumption. I actually spend the majority of my free time with others. It’s been a nice change of pace to have more time to myself but I feel that as I draw closer to the end of my time here, I’ll have less and less of it. The last couple of weekends I’ve spent doing a bit of traveling. We made a trip to just about the farthest place in Korea from where I live, Saraksan. It’s a giant national park that I’m sure looks gorgeous when it’s not raining for the 60 some hours you’re there.

Just 3 weeks left now. Well, 3 weeks til I finish my current contract job. I’m starting to get that weird feeling you get when you’re coming close to finishing something that’s been such a big part of your life. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy to almost finished but still, you know what I mean. Plans are still coming together for Thailand and I’m really excited about what God has planned for me there. I’ve also been getting really pumped to come back home. I miss my people. In the mean time I appreciate your prayers. In Drew Brees autobiography, he stresses the importance of “finishing strong”. I want that to be my motto for my lasting months abroad. I want to make lasting impressions on my friends here. I want to leave knowing that I followed God’s plan to the best of my abilities and that I didn’t spend the rest of my remaining time on cruise control.

Please continue to pray in these ways:
~My good friends Raymond, Robby, and Pat have all either gotten jobs or made it into grad school or both!
~Travel to Thailand and The Philippines. Pray for God’s will in the planning.
~Many Korean people have no idea who God is. Pray for those I come into contact with to thirst for real truth
~That the Word would continue to be spread in the hard to reach places and where Christians are not free to worship
~Pray for my careful job search for next year and that I am seeking after the Lord’s will
~Discernment, wisdom, and patience for God’s will
~Friends in the States are still seeking employment. Pray that God provides for those needs.
~Finding ways I can be Jesus to my friends, students, co-workers, and perfect strangers

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Half the Fun is to Plan the Plan

Back in Korea. Back into the groove of things. I’ve been spending the last few weeks going about my regular business here. TTT on Tuesdays, soccer on Wednesdays, teaching awesome songs/dances to my kindergarteners, and whatever other shenanigans come about on the weekends. The only downside to all this has been the coming and lingering of the rainy season. When I stare hopefully at my Changwon 10-day forecast, I’m usually left feeling pessimistic. Every day, there is a chance for showers and if there isn’t any rain, the ground still seems to always be wet and the air is inevitably sticky. But, that all is just a silly thing to complain about when you think of all the REAL problems happening in the world!

Almost to the day, I’m 4 short months away from officially returning home to America. I feel as if I have so many things left to do, places to see, and people to meet before I’m ready to be done. That said, coasting is not in my plans for the coming months. As you read, I’m figuring out how to fit “it” all together. I’m referring to the plan that the Lord is revealing to me day by day. The plan is to travel, seek, discover, learn, and serve…and maybe enjoy a little bit too. It’ll all kick-off with the completion of my contract here at Ewha ASL at the end of August. I will then spend the month of September soaking up what’s left of my time in Korea and preparing for the next 2 months. In early October I will be traveling to Thailand via Bangkok and spending roughly 2 1/2 weeks there. I have already began the process of contacting several missionaries, organizations, and individuals about what I can do to get involved. I’ve decided that this trip should be more than just a vacation for sightseeing, but that I should seek out what the Lord is doing in this part of the world. There’s nothing wrong with vacations, we all need them! But, I feel an impulse in my gut that I need to use this opportunity and my resources to learn and serve.

The plan is coming together slowly but surely. I’m excited about the way that God is bringing it all together. When I get an email from a contact or I read how to get from one place to another, I can’t help but thank God for his provision! Right now I’m planning to travel through Thailand visiting the cities of Bangkok, Chonburi, Chiang Mai, and Chiang Rai. I’m also attempting a trip to Siem Reap, Cambodia as well as a stop in Vientiane, Laos. If you know of anyone in these countries that I could try to meet with or stay with, please let me know! Also, I really appreciate your prayers for wisdom and discernment through this whole process!

I will then return to Korea for one last week at the end of October. I’ll say my goodbyes and collect my things before heading off to Manila, Philippines to meet up with John Dorrell who is currently working long-term for an orphanage/school. I’ll be spending close to two weeks with John and the kids helping out where I can and serving the people there in whatever capacity is needed. I’m excited about this opportunity to serve where my passion is strongest, children. Come mid-November, I’ll be boarding my plane to return home where I plan to go through culture shock and get fat at home through the holidays.

I can’t tell you how excited I am to discover what it is God is planning. I already feel so blessed to have the opportunities that I have here in Korea and believe that even greater things are still to come. Thank you to you for your loyal support and prayers in my time abroad and I look forward to seeing you when I return home for good!

Please continue to pray in these ways:
~My good friends Stephen and Hannah will be returning to America in a week. Pray for the transition as well as their search for jobs back home.
~Travel to Thailand and The Philippines. Pray for God’s will in the planning.
~Many Korean people have no idea who God is. Pray for those I come into contact with to thirst for real truth
~That the Word would continue to be spread in the hard to reach places and where Christians are not free to worship
~Pray for my careful job search for next year and that I am seeking after the Lord’s will
~Discernment, wisdom, and patience for God’s will
~Friends in the States are still seeking employment. Pray that God provides for those needs.
~Finding ways I can be Jesus to my friends, students, co-workers, and perfect strangers

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Friends, Family, and Sleep Deprivation

Going home was all that I hoped it would be and then some. I wouldn’t change a thing about my trip back to the States. Well, I would have certainly prefered not to have been redirected for 4 hours on my flight back to Korea…but that’s a different and not so important story. The important stories are the ones that led me to forfeit my time sleeping in my cozy bed in order to soak up as much of the little time I had with the people I love. When I look back on it, I can’t remember half the things I did because the were squeezed ever so precisely between other things I have a hard time remembering!

It started with a wedding. Well, a wedding rehearsal. This particular wedding rehearsal had not the pleasure of my company due to Chicago traffic putting a wrench in our plans. Still, I was able to see a good portion of my family the night before my cousin Tim’s wedding. The following morning, the Hatfield clan was reunited for the first time since last summer as a whole. With Josh living in Albuquerque and me in Korea, getting the family in the same place at the same time has proved to be a challenge! Nevertheless, we were all together for a whole 3 days! The wedding later that day went on without a hitch and I had a great time catching up with my mom’s side of the family.

The next day I invited a bunch of family and friends over to the house for a catch-all BBQ. Gracias to Mother Gwen and Father James for being so hospitable! It was really fun to hang out and see all of my closest friends as well as several uncles and grandma. That evening we went out to Mexican which is truly a delicacy to a foreigner living in Korea. My taste buds were dancing! As planned, food was an important part of my visit home. I’d like to think it falls somewhere under the category of “Friends”.

The following day I traveled 10 hours east to the beautiful city of Charlottesville, VA. This was an essential trip to take as it was my only opportunity to see my now girlfriend, Rebecca. Yes, the same girl who visited me in Korea in February. We spent the next 3 days exploring Charlottesville as she played host and tour guide. Once again, food seemed to be intertwined into whatever we did and wherever we went. It was particularly interesting to visit Monticello, Thomas Jefferson’s “dream home”. As expected, our time was memorable and I look forward to heading out her way again when I return from Korea in the fall.

700 miles and 12 hours later, I found myself arriving 15 minutes late for best friend Bryce’s wedding rehearsal. After running through the ceremony and of course eating, me and the boys spent one last night with Bryce…well, you know what I mean. The next morning we got up early and played 9 holes of very impressive (slight exaggeration) golf. 18 B-Dub wings later, it was time to get ready for the wedding. It was a very charming wedding to say the least. I was impressed how well everything fit together so well and was happy to see the first of my closest friends at Bethel get married. I walked away from the wedding feeling rejuvenated from all my friends and wondering to myself if anyone had invented a wick away dress shirt yet…I really needed one.

The next morning I slept in for the first time since arriving but the feeling was bittersweet. Afterall, 12 hours later I would be boarding a 777 to head back to my other home in Korea. One last lunch with the fam and an afternoon bike ride with my pops and I was on my way back to O’hare. My last hours in America were spent riding with one of my best friends, Raymond. It reminded me of my Bethel days and the seemingly long drives back and forth to Bethel on US30. It doesn’t seem long anymore. I guess the way you perceive things in the present are always different than down the road looking back. Going home brought back so many of those fond memories from high school and college and I just saw everything in a new, precious light. I wonder what I’ll think about my time in Korea a year from now. All I know for sure is that when I look back on my time growing up in Fort Wayne and Mishawaka I don’t regret a thing. I really did my best to embrace the people and places I was surrounded by. And in that same way, I live my life in Korea as if I won’t be returning…because afterall, I may never have the same fortune as I do with my college or home town.

So, here I am. Living each day in hopes that I can look back on this great adventure and believe with confidence that I really did it all. And not just for myself, but for God. Who or what has He put in my path so that I might be able to glorify Him? It’s something I’m striving to be aware of everyday. It is my hope that in these last 4 months that I will be mindful of Him in all that I do, say, and think.

Please continue to pray in these ways:
~There are possible opportunities for me to travel to Thailand and The Philippines. Pray for God’s will in the planning.
~Many Korean people have no idea who God is. Pray for those I come into contact with to thirst for real truth
~That the Word would continue to be spread in the hard to reach places and where Christians are not free to worship
~Pray for my careful job search for next year and that I am seeking after the Lord’s will
~Discernment, wisdom, and patience for God’s will
~Friends in the States are still seeking employment. Pray that God provides for those needs.
~Finding ways I can be Jesus to my friends, students, co-workers, and perfect strangers

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Coming Home!

This time tomorrow I will be on my way back to America! This is very exciting not only because I get to see my friends and family, but I also get a week off of work! Something I haven’t had since coming here 10 1/2 months ago. Also, I’m really pumped to see my cousin and best friend get hitched! Needless to say, my time will go by too fast and I’ll be really busy (I’d like to think of this trip as a business trip with friends/family) but I’m more than ready for it to happen! Thanks to everyone who prayed that this would work out, God for making it happen, and I hope to see you all very soon!

I will leave you with this song in spirit of my return…

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A Restful May, Enter June

Since I wrote last, May has carried on in a very pleasant manner. Between weeks of my typical daily regimen of work, soccer, and eating, I’ve spent the weekends taking it for the most part “easy”. It’s been a pretty conducive task as the weather has been getting nicer and nicer. Unfortunately, lurking behind the corner that is June awaits a terrible menace which makes Korea in the summer an unfortunate place to live. Rain. While I am more than willing to tolerate the occasional shower, Korea has a very humid and wet summer that brings about rainfall nearly every other day! Nevertheless, myself and Pearl (my always willing scooter) will endure the misty commutes to and from work!

In the last couple of weeks, I’ve had the chance to meet some new foreigners and say goodbye to others. While most of my original group of friends is still in tact, the end of this summer will inevitably bring about some tears of farewell, some of which will be for me. I’m still not sure on my exact departure from Korea but I have made a promise to be home by Thanksgiving. I finish with my current year-long contract at the end of August but I have plans to stay in Korea roughly 2 months longer. This is because I find it wisest to save a little more while I’m here and have a job before I return stateside and begin the arduous process of finding a job. As you know, I am really excited to return home but like living in any place for an extended time, leaving Korea for good will be difficult. I have established an identity and stake in this country, these people, and what I have been doing. In the end, leaving Korea may be just as difficult as it was to leave America.

Fortunately for me, I’ll have a little taste of home in less than 3 weeks. As I have written, on June 17th I will be returning home for 8 very short days. I’m thrilled at the opportunity to see my cousin and best friend get married, let alone see the many loved ones that I haven’t seen for almost a year! It is my sincere hope that I will get to see as many of YOU as possible during that time.

Your continued prayers for me are never taken for granted. I genuinely appreciate every one of you that takes time away from your day to think about me. While the future is hopeful, there are still a lot of questions running through my head as to where I will be this time next year. Does the Lord have plans for me to be teaching in America? If so, where? I continue to pray for discernment and wisdom as I seek out where it is God wants to lead me. I try my best not to box Him in and get Him to agree with what I want to do. Instead, I am praying that doors will be opened and closed. Please pray that I would be diligent in listening to what He wants to reveal to me. Prayer is effective and it is our 24/7 open line of communication to the Almighty. And in our prayer, we get to be part of the plans that He has for us. We get to see His perfect will play out in our lives as well as those around us.

“Thus says the Lord who made the earth, the Lord who formed it to establish it—the Lord is his name: Call to me and I will answer you, and will tell you great and hidden things that you have not known.”
—Jeremiah 33:2-3

Please continue to pray in these ways:
~Praise: My friends Bryan got the job at East Noble!
~Many Korean people have no idea who God is. Pray for those I come into contact with to thirst for real truth
~That my trip home in June would be fruitful and go smoothly
~That the Word would continue to be spread in the hard to reach places and where Christians are not free to worship
~Pray for my careful job search for next year and that I am seeking after the Lord’s will
~Discernment, wisdom, and patience for God’s will
~Friends in the States are still seeking employment. Pray that God provides for those needs.
~Finding ways I can be Jesus to my friends, students, co-workers, and perfect strangers

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A Day for Children, Parents, and Buddha

It’s been a wild week here in Korea. With 3 back-to-back holidays, my apartment has remained for the most part vacant and my nose and neckline sun-kissed. This month so far I’ve already appeared in a Korean movie, visited an amusement park, and haven’t wrecked my scooter once! When you don’t get many vacation days you really have to take advantage of them when they come. So, the morning of Children’s day (5/5) I went on a hike with my friend Jacob. We had a great view from up top and even played a little target practice with our air soft pistols. We were getting short on time, so we had to dodge several jaw-dropped Koreans on our record-setting 20 minute descent! After pumping a little iron and cleaning up at a Korean Jimjalbang (bath house) I met up with some folks from church for lunch. We enjoyed some delicious Indian and later walked around the park where it seemed like every child in Changwon was playing with their parents.

Saturday morning 6 of my friends and I took a bus up to Seoul for the World DJ Festival. We made our now routine lunch stop at Taco Bell and did a little shopping before hopping on the hour and a half subway ride that would take us to the festival. We really saw God’s provision when we arrived. I had been really worried about finding a place to stay the night because we had no prior arrangements, but God provided a really great place not too far away. He then helped us out again when we had no way of getting to the concert. A man ended up driving us in his truck from the gas station we were stranded at to the concert! The festival was a blast and everyone had a really great time. It featured DJ’s from around the world on 4 large stages. Thousands of Koreans and foreigners showed up to listen to the techno beats and dance the night away. This will certainly be one of my favorite memories from my time here in Korea. The next day we met up with my friend Cheon Woo in Seoul and visited the largest palace in Korea. It was such a beautiful day and the palace grounds were exquisite. This was also Parent’s Day (5/8) in Korea so we saw several moms and dads walking around with carnations pinned to their shirts.

Back in Changwon, I worked a normal day on Monday but then had another holiday off on Tuesday for Buddha’s birthday (5/10). While I’m thankful for the vacation, I can’t rejoice in knowing that it comes at the cost of millions being deceived by a religious figure. It pained my heart to see hundreds of cars parked alongside of Buddhist temples and people trekking up the road toward the festivities. I spent the day with several church friends for a little kickball action in the park. The rain held off just enough for us to play a really fun game with our sister English service church Hanbit. It was such a blessing to fellowship with other Christians in our city and our presence attracted onlookers in the park. It was cool to talk to Koreans who were just passing by and tell them who we were and what we were all about!

With the holidays, the last few weeks have flown by and this week is even abbreviated! It’s hard to believe that in just over a month I’ll be flying home to see my best friend and cousin get married! God continues to provide for me strength, hope, and guidance in my time here and I continually thank Him for his daily provision. I’m still seeking after His wisdom for the months following my time here in Korea and I know that He will light my path wherever that may be.

Thanks to everyone who continues to keep me in prayer. Please consider these requests in your prayers…
~That people would turn from vengeful attitudes in wake of Osama Bin Laden’s death
~My friend Bryan is interviewing for a job at East Noble HS. It’s my hope that this is the right place for him!
~Pray for my careful job search for next year and that I am seeking after the Lord’s will
~Discernment, wisdom, and patience for God’s will
~Friends in the States are still seeking employment. Pray that God provides for those needs.
~Finding ways I can be Jesus to my friends, students, co-workers, and perfect strangers

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